5 signs you're stuck in fight or flight + tips to balance your nervous system
With all the buzz about nervous system regulation, maybe you’ve been wondering: “does my nervous system need some attention?”
It’s an important question, considering the crucial role that your nervous system plays in overall health and happiness. For people who are dysregulated, simple tasks like going to work or exercising are a lot more difficult (sometimes even impossible) to achieve. It has nothing to do with willpower or discipline and everything to do with being stuck in a state of fight-or-flight. Imagine being under attack by a bear and trying to think about how much fiber is in your meal… Probably not top of mind, right?
Well, this is what it’s like to have a dysregulated nervous system; you are constantly on high alert, even when it doesn’t make any logical sense. While you may not actually be under attack, but your subconscious mind thinks that you are, and as you may or may not know, your subconscious is running the show for 95% of your day.
What does it mean to be stuck in fight-or-flight?
Being stuck in fight-or-flight simply means that your nervous system (which consists of your brain, spinal cord, and nerves) feels generally unsafe, and therefore, sends your body into a state of high alert. This can happen when you A) feel high levels of stress in your environment, or B) when something happened in your past that actually hurt or threatened you, and the memory of it still lives rent-free in your subconscious.
For example, let’s say you were bullied in school. You may feel tense and anxious in social settings, even if your conscious mind knows that these particular people are kind. Your subconscious remembers the humiliation, and puts you in a state of high alert around strangers to prevent you from getting hurt again. This memory of being bullied may not have even crossed your mind in years, but your subconscious remembers, and therefore, your body might react in ways that feel irrational and beyond your control.
This is just one example of the many ways your subconscious mind “stores” negative memories, even when your conscious mind forgets.
Chronic stress and your nervous system
While things from your past can throw your nervous system out of balance, so too can things from your present. High levels of stress, either from work, finances, or otherwise, can also feel like a threat to your nervous system. Unfortunately, the part of your brain that dictates your emotions can’t differentiate work stress from life threatening stress. It responds the same way it would respond to a bear chasing you: by releasing a hormone called cortisol.
Cortisol is an important hormone. It tells us to move aside when a car is coming, helps us focus for a big performance, and gets us out of bed for work each day. After the stressful event subsides though, it’s important that your body returns to homeostasis. This is also known as your “rest and digest” mode. Here, your body feels safe enough to focus on “routine maintenance” in the body - digesting food, regulating hormones, cleansing toxins, generating new cells, and much more are all happening when you are in a state of relaxation. However, if you’re constantly stressed out, then your body never has a chance to recover. This is when your new “baseline” or homeostasis becomes fight-or-flight, and your nervous system becomes dysregulated.
Consequences of being stuck in fight or flight
Aside from being a generally uncomfortable way to live life, being stuck in fight or flight also has other consequences of. When your body releases cortisol, all the “routine maintenance” functions - hormones, digesting food, good quality sleep, detoxification and general energy and vitality - begin to suffer. Because your body isn’t getting what it needs, you might experience symptoms like gut issues, brain fog, chronic fatigue, skin breakouts, sleep problems, or hormonal issues. You might chalk it up to something you’re eating or something in your environment causing your symptoms, but it could just be that your nervous system needs some regulating.
The real kicker is that it’s a two-way street: just as nervous system dysregulation can lead to chronic gut and hormonal imbalances, chronic gut and hormonal imbalances can make nervous system dysregulation worse. This is why I emphasize a root cause approach to health and wellness: your mind and body are in a symbiotic relationship, and we can’t look at one without look at the other.
So before you commit to an intense exercise routine or do a detox, you should first ask yourself where your nervous system health is at, because it may be the answer to start feeling better, and balancing your nervous system will help you have the energy and capacity to change your habits and stick to a good routine.
Signs you’re stuck in fight or flight
There are a few tell-tale signs that will signal whether or not your nervous system is dysregulated.
1) You feel like you can never relax: when is the last time you felt fully present and at peace? When is the last time you let your hair down, had a good laugh, or spent time doing something that feeds your soul? If you can’t remember, it may be a sign that your nervous system is on high alert most of the time. You might feel resistance to being still and spending time alone with yourself because your emotions feel intense.
2) You over-react or feel highly irritable: Maybe you feel like small annoyances set you off, or maybe you have a tendency to lash out when you feel angry. There’s no need to judge yourself here. Think back to the bear example: if you were under attack and somebody crossed you, you’d probably have a much more intense reaction than if someone crossed you while you were in a restful, peaceful state. This is how your nervous system feels - like it’s under attack. So give yourself a break, and read on for tips to self regulate!
3) Unexplained Fatigue: Living in fight or flight takes a LOT of energy, so it’s likely that you will feel inexplicably tired at odd times of the day if your nervous system is out of balance. You might even sleep a full 8-10 hours and STILL feel like you have abnormally low energy throughout the day. As you begin to nurture your nervous system, you will undoubtedly notice your energy levels improve.
4) Gut issues: Because your digestive system isn’t getting the attention it needs when you’re stuck in fight or flight, your gut health will eventually begin to suffer. Chronic constipation, bloating, diarrhea, and stomach pain are all influenced by the health of our nervous system. Of course proper nutrition and exercise is essential, but don’t neglect nervous system regulation when it comes to your gut health journey!
5) Hormonal imbalance: Hormone function is low priority when your body feels like it’s under attack, so you might experience low sex drive, fatigue, digestive issues and weight instability - all symptoms of hormonal imbalance. While optimizing nutrition is important, lowering stress and regulating the nervous system definitely plays a role.
My favorite nervous system regulation tools
Luckily, there are a lot of tools you can try on help bring your nervous system back into balance. Of course, I always recommend talking to a therapist when it comes to things like trauma, anxiety or anything in between, but there are also some great tools out there to get you started that are free/low cost. Here are some of my favs:
1) Breathing exercises: Without a doubt, controlled breathing is the quickest and most effective way to bring your nervous system back into balance when triggers arise. Slow breathing for at least 1 minute activates your “rest and digest” mode and helps the body return to baseline. Alternate nostril breathing and box breathing are two highly effective techniques to self regulate. And it’s free!
2) Cold therapy: There’s a lot of compelling research looking at the benefits of cold therapy on nervous system health. Exposing the body to cold temperatures for a period of time has been shown to improve heart rate variability (which is an indicator of good nervous system health), stimulate the vagus nerve (activates rest & digest mode), and even reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression over time.
3) Mind-body movement: Of course exercise is great for you on all fronts, but exercising with full body awareness takes the benefits on your nervous system to the next level. By noticing your muscles contract as you lift weights, synchronizing your breath to your footsteps as you jog, moving with your inhales and exhales in yoga, an so forth, you’re able to relax your thinking mind, feel into your body, and bring your nervous system into a restful state.
4) Ground in nature: while you probably already know that you feel calmer when outdoors, grounding (or earthing) is a more intentional practice of making direct skin contact with the earth (grass, dirt, sand etc.) for at least 30 minutes. This direct skin-to-earth contact allows the earth’s electrons to transfer into your body, which has been shown to reduce inflammation, improve blood flow, and make us feel more at ease.
5) Work on self esteem and boundaries: Much of the stress we feel is stress that we unintentionally create - we over commit, say yes to things we don’t have energy for, and let people take advantage of us. A big part of coming back to a healthy homeostasis is likely going to involve setting stronger boundaries and feeling confident enough in yourself to hold those boundaries. I encourage you to make self esteem work part of your regular wellness routine, because it will undoubtedly have ripple effects on your entire life. Daily affirmations, making and keeping small promises to yourself, and fostering a kind inner dialogue are just a few of the many ways you can start improving your self worth and self esteem.
I hope you found this guide helpful in bringing your body and mind back to a healthy homeostasis so you can have the energy and space to take care of yourself and do the things you love. If you need some help reaching your health & wellness goals and prefer a mind-body approach, click here to learn more about health & wellness coaching.
